No matter how positive you try to be in your day-to-day life, the truth is, there are just going to be days or even weeks when you’ll feel down or in a rut.
It’s an unavoidable truth for even the most optimistic people because we’re only human.
Things like irritation, boredom, anger, and negative emotions have a way of hitting you when you least expect them, no matter how prepared you think you are to deal with them.
That’s the bad news; the good news is that there’s something you can do about it. You don’t have to lie down and let this rough patch get the best of you.
The secret is deciding not to let it take hold of you and taking action to fight it as soon as you realize it’s happening. If you wait too long, you could fall victim to it and risk losing valuable time and feeling sad.
I wrote this article to give tips on working with problems and negative emotions that life will toss at you every now and then without letting them consume you.
Take Time To Identify What You’re Feeling
The first step you need to take is to recognize and identify what it is that’s starting to bother you. Take some time alone to really sit and reflect on what’s truly going on and what you’re actually feeling.
Sometimes things aren’t what they seem, and when we have a problem, we tend to blame others instead of ourselves.
For example, is your job bumming you out and giving you anxiety? It might be easiest to blame your boss or co-workers, but ask yourself if they’re the problem.
Look as far inside yourself as possible to see if there’s a more significant issue that you’re choosing to ignore. You might be surprised at what you’ll find when you look further at a situation.
Maybe you initially thought that your co-worker was just so annoying, but the truth is that you only feel that way because you’re envious of them.
Perhaps you resent that they get more praise or seem to get away with doing less work than you.
Maybe your boss isn’t just mean to you for no reason- perhaps you aren’t performing as well as you know you can, and you aren’t taking responsibility for your actions.
Just because you have seniority doesn’t mean those above you are willing to take less from you. Could you’ve stopped taking the initiative and begun relying on others to do things for you at work?
Maybe something else is distracting you and keeping you from doing the best job you can do. Sometimes people get burned out at work, and it’s time to change it up and do something different.
Sit Back And Experience How The Feelings Are Affecting You
Once you’ve identified what’s making you feel these negative feelings, keep it at the forefront of your mind. Don’t let it get shoved away again.
It’s vital that you literally sit down and really FEEL it, let it sink way in. Think about how it makes you feel, how it manifests in your life, and how it stifles your goals.
You may have realized the issue before but didn’t hold on to it or deal with it. Instead, you chose to ignore it and let it disappear, only to come back up later.
You may have thought that if you disregard it, it will just fix itself. However, everything always comes back up until you deal with it at its root.
More often than not, it comes back with a vengeance and makes you feel even worse every time. It’s time to take the reins and deal with it once and for all.
This is especially true when the solution to the issue means doing something you don’t want to do.
It could be that you KNOW you’re burned out at your job and need to find something different, but you also know how much work that’ll be and don’t want to put in the work it takes to switch.
You hate looking for a job, refreshing your resume, scheduling interviews, and even being interviewed.
It’s a lot of work, and staying where you’re unhappy is easier, but it won’t make your negative feelings disappear.
Discomfort motivates change, which is why you need to feel the discomfort. Let it sink in, and genuinely feel how uncomfortable it makes you feel.
This unpleasant feeling is the fuel you need to grow and make the changes necessary to live your best life. Please don’t ignore these feelings; USE them!
Stand Up To The Problem Instead Of Resisting It
As the famous psychologist, Carl Jung once said, “What you resist not only persists, but will grow in size.” What does this mean exactly?
It means that when you ignore the obstacles standing in the way of your happiness, they will remain there and remain a problem until you address them.
Once you’ve identified the problem and experienced the pain it brings, your next step is to stop trying to resist it and tackle it.
Resistance and resolution are on opposite ends of each other. Resistance will not bring about the changes you need to make to be happy, but resolving them will.
It’s pretty basic. When you let things go unresolved, they grow and become harder to deal with.
You may even begin accepting them as truths and think that’s how it must be, that you’re just one of the unlucky ones who are doomed to a lifetime of unhappiness. This isn’t true at all!
Your future and feelings are always within your control, and you must remember this. No matter how hard something might be, you can always do something to improve it.
Even if it just means changing your mindset and attitude towards it.
Stop resisting and start taking responsibility for yourself, even if that means accepting blame and acknowledging your role.
Have A Deep Conversation With Yourself About The Issue
After you’ve identified, experienced, and stopped resisting your feelings, it’s time to have a deep inner conversation with yourself about everything.
Just because the problems you’re facing might be your responsibility doesn’t mean everything is your fault.
In this next stage, you accept that even though you had something to do with the negativity, you can see others have also played a role.
Only after you accept some personal blame can you look around and see what else went wrong. You may be burned out on your job and want to move on, but it’s also possible that your co-workers’ lazy attitude or your boss’s extreme rudeness has been a significant factor in how you feel.
They may not have been the easiest to work with, but you also know that you’re the only one who will stand up for yourself and make things change.
This step can be a terrifying one to go through with. You have to walk a fine line between honesty and professionalism.
You can decide to switch jobs or have a reasonable and professional conversation with those affecting your work satisfaction.
Before doing either, I suggest you take a notebook and write down everything you feel; this will help you prepare for what’s to come.
Please write down your issues, what you’ve been doing about them, how they make you feel, what you wish you could do differently, and how doing things differently would benefit you.
This process is similar to a pros and cons list but way more in-depth and all-encompassing. Anytime you’re about to make big decisions, writing it all out on paper ahead of time helps you and gives you something tangible to put your finger on when you’re confused.
Make your decisions based on the dialogue you have had with yourself.
Make An Informed And Intentional Decision
Once you’ve expressed your feelings on paper and re-read it until it all makes more sense, you’ll be ready to make these important decisions.
If you decide it would benefit you to do things differently based on how you feel and what you’ve written, you can begin the change process. It helps to break the journey down into steps.
For example, if you choose to have a conversation with your boss, write down the steps you need to take:
Ask them for a meeting via email, collect paperwork or a proposal that helps back up your position, and lastly, decide what talking points you want to use and what subjects you want to make sure you address.
Present everything to them calmly and professionally.
It may feel terrifying and overwhelming at first, but this is why breaking it into baby steps is essential. This goes for anything you decide to do, find a new job, learn a new skill, eat healthier, etc.
You have to make a conscious decision of what you want, then make a plan on how to achieve it.
Keep Up The Momentum
Once you’ve passed the previous steps, you’ll need to hold onto the momentum you’ve gathered!
Good things are challenging, and sometimes you’ll have to take these steps more than once for them to sink in and for changes to take place.
Holding onto your momentum will keep you going when things get frustrating, and you feel like giving up. Keep a journal that you can write in daily to keep track of your progress.
Every little victory counts, so don’t get discouraged when things don’t seem to be happening fast enough. Sometimes in life, for every step forward you take, you fall back two steps.
Having a journal with a collection of victories and forward steps helps remind you that, however slowly it may feel, things are improving and that you need to stay persistent.
Remain Vigilant And Mindful
This step is the last one towards taking control of your negative feelings! If you’ve made it this far, chances are you feel a lot better and hopefully have made positive changes in your life.
You took what was bringing you down and worked towards improving it- good job!! You may think this is it, and you’re in the clear, but you must remember to stay vigilant.
If you’re not careful, the negative behaviors you’ve worked so hard to eliminate can creep back in. Before you know it, you’re right back where you started.
This can happen because you’ve been set in your habits for a long time without realizing it. It’s going to take a while before your positive new habits start to become second-nature and override the negative ones.
You may have to follow these seven steps more than once before the negative habits disappear entirely.
By identifying, experiencing, recognizing resistance, having a conversation about it, making a conscious choice to fix the problem, keeping your momentum, and remaining vigilant, you can break down these problems, stress, and feelings of anxiety.
There is nothing you can’t overcome by following these steps.
Let a psychic advisor guide you through it if you can’t seem to break through negative emotions or don’t think you have it in you to change your mindset and attitude.
A talented psychic can determine what you need the most help with and lead you through your issues, whether work-related, love-related, money related, or have to do with friends and family.
Click on the box below for a list of top-rated and highly reviewed psychic advisors. They’re ready to help you make sense of everything you’re going through.