Allowing Yourself To Love Again After The Death Of A Partner

If you’ve ever experienced the death of a spouse or partner, you know how devastating it can be. You might feel like you’ll never be able to recover from the loss or experience happiness ever again.

However hard it may be to believe now, you should know that future love and happiness are possible again.

You’ll always have them in your heart, but that doesn’t mean you can’t love someone else ever again. I can assure you your loved one doesn’t want you to grieve them for the rest of your life or push any potential love away.

They loved you in life and even in death would want nothing more than for you to be happy again. They know you deserve someone who will treat you lovingly and unconditionally.

If you want a romantic relationship again after grieving and healing, don’t fight the feeling or feel guilty about it.

However, I suggest you do not jump straight into a relationship after the recent death of a partner. Grieving is a long and challenging process, but you must go through it to receive love again fully.

Getting involved in a romantic relationship with another person before you’ve grieved will rob you of your opportunity to recover from the loss in the healthiest way possible and forge forward with your new life.

Once you know the time is right for you to reopen your heart and are ready to move forward, follow these tips to make the process as easy as possible:

Give Yourself Time to Become Whole Again Grieving death of partner

After the death of a partner, it can take a long time to feel whole again. The amount of time varies from person to person and depends on the relationship’s dynamic.

There’s no set amount of time someone must do this in. For some, it might take years; for others, it can take decades or even a lifetime.

Please take all the time in the world to feel your feelings, sadness, and heartache. Don’t be ashamed of these feelings, and don’t try to ignore them.

You need to get past this point before even considering dating someone else.

If you don’t, you might find yourself helplessly searching for someone to replace what you lost if you aren’t patient with yourself and force yourself to move on before you’re truly ready.

You’ll be closed off and won’t be open to accepting a completely different person, and this will cause you to put a lot of expectations and pressure on whoever you try to date.

You shouldn’t expect this new person to complete you and make you whole again; that’s something you must do first and foremost on your own.

The process of getting back to yourself and becoming whole again after a devastating loss is different for everyone. Unfortunately, what works for one person may not work for another.

Since this is one of the most crucial parts of allowing yourself to date again, I recommend getting a personalized plan from a professional psychic.

During a consultation, they can help you discover what methods you respond to best and guide you through the process.

It’s a multifaceted approach that can be hard to do by yourself. The psychics on my reviews page have years of experience guiding people out of the dark and into the light.

Create A Personal Support SystemCreating a support system

I think we can all agree that dating and finding true love in this day and age can be tricky. It won’t happen overnight, and probably won’t be with the first person you meet after your loss. 

You must be prepared to date again and go through some trial and error. It may feel tedious, frustrating, and even downright aggravating sometimes, but it will all be worth it when you find that special someone again.

While you’re dating, you must have a strong support system around you. This system can be close friends, family members, or even co-workers you know very well.

It must be consist of people who can be there for you when you need them the most. As I said, dating can be frustrating, and you’ll need somebody to vent, cry, and bounce ideas with.

It goes without saying, but your support system should be on board with your decision to date again. You can’t expect someone who thinks you should be alone the rest of your life to help with dating matters.

These people also need to know you in-depth to fully understand your wants and needs. They’ll understand your need to find love again if they love you.

It’s easy to see things through rose-colored lenses when you first start dating someone. Your support system needs to be able to tell you when they see red flags or warning signs that you might have missed.

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Pay Attention To What Your Support System Tells You

They will only let you settle for someone if they’re right for you. They should also be able to tell you when they feel like someone isn’t treating you the way you deserve.

You trust the people in your support system for a reason, so hear them out when they have strong feelings about someone.

You may find it’s more complicated than you thought to find a group of close-knit people for your support system.

Maybe everyone you know is against you dating, or they feel a particular loyalty to the deceased that makes them feel guilty about “allowing” you to move on.

This guilt is especially possible if they were your partner’s friends or family first before you entered their life. That’s perfectly okay, and you should never force someone to let go of their beliefs.

You know what’s best for you and don’t have to convince anyone else of it. In cases like this, a gifted psychic is an excellent person to turn to. 

They will get to know you, your wants and needs, and listen to you without judgment. They’ll be able to tell you what they think is best for you, and you can use their advice as a good starting point.

Don’t Try To Recreate Your Previous RelationshipBeing open to change

I know change can be difficult, but you must resist the urge to try and recreate what you had with your late partner.

Even if you find a great person to move forward with and love again, your new relationship will probably not be exactly like your first one.

Don’t try to force it into being identical. Embrace the change and the new connection. Please don’t hang your hopes and expectations on it being the same. Accept it as a whole different experience and appreciate it for what it is.

Don’t expect them to like the same music, movies, foods, hobbies, etc. Let them be themselves and enjoy getting to know someone unique.

Try different activities and eat at other restaurants than you did with your partner. Experiment with new challenges, flavors, and sounds.

Make special memories with potential partners. Please don’t ask them to style their hair or dress like your late partner. Be open to different looks and styles.

Trying to make your new date play the role of your late partner is not fair for either of you, and you owe it to yourself to step out of your comfort zone. That’s the only way you can grow and evolve.

If you genuinely cannot imagine being with anyone who isn’t identical to your partner, then it could be that you haven’t grieved enough or you aren’t attracted to anyone but them.

There’s nothing wrong with that; some people remain widows for the rest of their lives and focus on themselves.

They still have very fulfilling lives and don’t feel like they’re missing out on anything. It works great for them, but if that’s not the case with you, then you’ll have to embrace the changes to come.

Give Yourself Permission To CompareComparing new date to ex

While it’s true that you shouldn’t expect new dates to be just like your late partner, you’re inevitably going to compare the two in your mind.

This behavior is a normal response, and you shouldn’t beat yourself up over it. It’s only natural since you spent so much time with your lost loved one and learned everything about them.

Being faced with someone new and learning their habits takes some time. Allow these thoughts to be in your mind, sit with them, process them, and learn to accept them.

In time you’ll see that you do it less and less as you get to know your new partner more. Just because you have these thoughts in your mind doesn’t mean you should express them to your new love interest, though.

Doing so will only make them feel like you wish they were them and that they aren’t good enough for you. It’s hard for people who haven’t experienced the loss of a spouse to understand the feelings that come with it.

If you need to express these thoughts to someone other than yourself, reach out to that support system or an online psychic to share them and get them off your chest.

Please don’t dwell on the comparisons or be upset by them. Just acknowledge they’re there and remember to be open to new experiences.

If it all seems like too much to take and you can’t stop comparing them to your late partner, you may need to step back and stop dating for a while.

Some comparing is normal, but doing nothing but comparing can harm the relationship before it’s even had a chance to start.

Work Past Feelings of Guilt Working past guilt

If you feel guilty about having thoughts and feelings for someone new after losing your spouse, know that you’re not alone.

It’s normal to feel like you’re “cheating” on them, “forgetting” them, or “replacing” them, but none of this is true. As I mentioned, your late lover would not want you to live alone for the rest of your days.

They loved you because of how you brought happiness into their life, how you cared deeply about them, and how you faced the world, and they would not want you to lose those parts of yourself.

They would like you to keep your beautiful spirit and use it to light up someone else’s world. Know that you gave them your love until the end and that you did right by them.

You deserve to love and be loved again. Let go of your guilt and allow yourself to open up to love again after you’ve grieved and worked towards healing.

Journaling, meditating, or speaking to a psychic medium are all ways to process your guilt and work through these complicated emotions. 

Talented mediums can relay messages from the spirits of those who have passed if the time is right and the deceased is ready. This can help you realize that they aren’t upset that you want to love and be loved again.

Rediscover and Redefine Yourself Rediscovering yourself after loss

People tend to blend their lives together in long-term relationships around shared interests and hobbies.

These interests and activities may be so ingrained in you at this point that you don’t know what else to do after the death of a spouse. You may feel lost without your nightly show-watching or your weekly game nights.

This is normal, but for you to move forward and continue living your life after the loss, you need to create new activities that make you happy.

Create new rituals instead of relying on those you’ve been doing for so long out of habit.

Learn new skills, pick up new hobbies, and become more socially active. These things will push you forwards into the next stage of your life.

When you’re living a happy, vibrant life, you’re more likely to attract others who are also making the most out of life.

You’ll improve the chances of meeting that person with whom you can have a healthy and loving relationship once again. It’s true what they say about how your vibe attracts your tribe.

You owe it to yourself and your late partner to rediscover yourself and find joy in life again. Find what makes you happy and do it to the fullest. 

Moving on with a new relationship doesn’t mean the love with your late partner was never there. It doesn’t mean you’ve forgotten about them or no longer care about them.

It’s Okay For Your Life To Move Forward

You can love and care for someone who is no longer with you and for someone who wants to be a part of your remaining life.

It’s not cheating or abandoning what you used to have, it’s taking that love you had together and using it to propel you into the next stage of your journey.

The process of learning to love again is different for everyone but they all have these basic things in common.

Allow yourself to feel any feelings that come up, process them, and listen to your intuition throughout your dating journey.

It’s not easy, but it IS worth it. Lean on your support system and talk to a psychic reader anytime you feel lost, confused, conflicted, or guilty. You don’t have to go this alone.

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Angela

Angela

Angela Moore founded Psychic Review Online in 2008 after being scammed out of her life savings by a psychic con artist. Since then she has devoted her time to rooting out the frauds and helping people find a real psychic reader.

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